Seeing my mother in dreams...

It first happened about 2 months ago (I think). I had a dream that I was at a house, it was familiar but I didn't recognize it. On the side of the house was a porch like area. I was talking to my mother, I can't remember any of the conversation. She was sitting in a chair. Then Kate, a lady I worked with at PetSmart came waling up and her and my mother started talking. I remember asking "do you to know each other?" They both looked and me and said yes they did. They continued to talk and I walked off to tend to something else.

The next time (that I can remember) was just a couple of weeks ago. I was walking up to the back of the house. The one I grew up in and the one my mom lived in then she died. It was different because there was a covered area attached to the back of the house. There was a bench of some kind that Dick and a couple of other people where working at. I could not see what they where working on they had their backs to me. I watch for a few minutes, they either did not know I was there or just ignored me. When they all of a sudden went into the house I noticed my mother sitting by the bench, on a stool I think. She was not making eye contact with me she was just kind of gazing at the bench. I walked up to her and we hugged. I told her I was sorry and that I thought everyone understood that I was to take care of things (when she died). She said in a very low voice... "So did I, I thought I made it clear". I then heard the phone ring in the house. I started up the steps and inside the door before I realized it had not rang a second time. I turned to go back to mom, she was still sitting there. I can't remember anything after that. I knew I was dreaming and that I wanted to remember it. I woke up, I was hoping to return to the dream when I fell back to sleep. If I did I don't remember it. I still don't feel like there was a message to do anything or take any new action. I can't stop wondering if I was suppose to get something else from it. I'm so pissed at Dick and Patty for pushing me out! It's not fair... we (my mother and I) where so close. She was really close to Nanci and all the kids too. It just sucks!

Physical Today, Ginger Visits, Kairi's First Hike!

So I went in for a physical today. Not bad, but not great either. I'm fat, real fat! I weighed in at 242 lbs. That's fat, especially when I'm 5' 8". Myblood pressure was high today too, 140/98. My BP has always been 125/70. Not anymore. I have to wait 7 to 10 days for the blood tests results. I have a female doctor. She is great, we have been going to her for years. Speaking of years, it's been 3 years since I was there last. Nanci has her physical tomorrow and Tina the next day. We have insurance again.

Ginger showed up last Friday for the weekend. She stayed Friday through Monday. Nanci had to work everyday of course. I had Saturday and Sunday off. We took Ginger to Rainbow Falls in Manituo then lunch. Kairi loved hanging out with Ginger.





Sunday we went for a hike at Spruce Mountain Open Space. It sits between Larkspur and Monument. The full hike is 5.5 miles. We had Kairi with us so we took a short route to the top of the mountain. This was the first hike for Kairi so, we where not too sure how she would do. She had energy the whole way! She loved hiking. We are planing on taking her again next week.